Forum: Air Force Life

Navy Chicken: Let's use phrases that make no sense, and that no one else uses while crossing roads. Let's also cross roads wearing as many different uniforms as possible.

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On Topic

Chicken Switch

A cow and a pig are watching a chicken cross the road, the cow looks at the pig and says "I feel a joke coming on."

CREW CHIEFS

will work 12 hours to get scheduled chicken across the road even though there is a perfectly good chicken right next to it that is not on the schedule

UNIT FITNESS PROGRAM MANAGER

Comanders are required to give all chickens time to cross the road durring duty hours a minimum of three days a week. Duty hours are not to be extended for the purpose of crossing the road.

Having been somewhat out of line with my comments about F-22 targets, I’ll try to make up for it.

F-22 pilot chicken presenting a PowerPoint road crossing ROE briefing to the day’s adversaries:

Next slide, please. Slide #7 Adversaries Without Radars

"This is directed at our plucked, er...I mean plucky, respected adversary chickens without radars. As you can see, we would like you to just wander around out there doing whatever it is you do, and we will shoot at you."

Next slide, please. Slide #8 Adversaries With Radars

"This is directed at our experienced, respected adversary chickens with radars. As you can see, we would like you to just wander around out there doing whatever it is you do, in a tactically sound way, and we will shoot at you."

Slide #9 Questions?

OL

("Oh yes, and one more thing chickens, above all and regardless of the outcome, try not to get the beak.")

Wolverine Chicken: crosses the road, hit by bus. Heals, pops claws, kills the bus.

(sorry - kinda lookin forward to the movie Laughing

)

Quote:

Wolverine Chicken: crosses the road, hit by bus. Heals, pops claws, kills the bus.

Buckeye Chicken, crosses the road, nearly gets across before he is eaten by a Gator.

Comic Book Hero Movie Watching Chicken: Along with his counterpart, the Star Trekkie Chicken, can never get a hen to cross the road with him, and therefore can never truly call himself a rooster.

lol

SUV Chicken: crosses the road, but has to mortgage house to pay for fuel

Quote:

Star Trekkie Chicken

I resemble that remark--not the chicken part. However I'm a Trekker, not a Trekkie, as Proof, I submit a proverb:
qaStaHvIS wa' ram loS SaD Hugh SIjlaH qetbogh loD

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
James T. Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Mr. Scott: 'Cos ma wee transporter beam was na functioning properly. Ah canna work miracles, Captain.
Dr. McCoy: Dammit Jim!! I'm a doctor not an farmer!
Mr. Spock: Obviously, it was the logical thing to do.
Mr. Data: Why is a barn yard fowl crossing a thoroughfare humorous?
Mr. Worf: For the honor of all chickens.
Counselor Troi: I knew it was going to happen. I could sense it.
Computer: Insufficient information.

Q: Why did the Borg cross the road?
A: Because it assimilated the chicken!

When I go to college, I already know what frat I'll be in: Nu Epsilon Rho Delta....

ptplauthor wrote:

Quote:

Star Trekkie Chicken

I resemble that remark--not the chicken part. However I'm a Trekker, not a Trekkie, as Proof, I submit a proverb:
qaStaHvIS wa' ram loS SaD Hugh SIjlaH qetbogh loD

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
James T. Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Mr. Scott: 'Cos ma wee transporter beam was na functioning properly. Ah canna work miracles, Captain.
Dr. McCoy: Dammit Jim!! I'm a doctor not an farmer!
Mr. Spock: Obviously, it was the logical thing to do.
Mr. Data: Why is a barn yard fowl crossing a thoroughfare humorous?
Mr. Worf: For the honor of all chickens.
Counselor Troi: I knew it was going to happen. I could sense it.
Computer: Insufficient information.

Q: Why did the Borg cross the road?
A: Because it assimilated the chicken!

When I go to college, I already know what frat I'll be in: Nu Epsilon Rho Delta....

TC: you gave ME grief? JK its all good - had a decent laugh, keep it coming. Laughing

Trekkie Chicken: Crosses where no chicken has dared to cross, all while sitting glued to his tv set. Claims his alias is not "Trekkie", but "Trekker", as if this would make it any easier to cross road with Hens.

Q: Why did Captain Kirk remember to buy extra toilet paper?
A: Because Klingons were on his @$$!

Best scene ever from Star Trek! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_kZJJUc4mQ

All chickens crossing the road must post, at a minimum, Two road guard chickens before any chiuckens may cross

Quote:

TC: you gave ME grief? JK its all good - had a decent laugh, keep it coming. Laughing

Superhero comic books are geeky, Star Trek and Star Wars are for NERDS....there's a HUGE difference.....hard to explain, but it's there, we nerds make fun of geeks. You'll only catch me reading Calvin & Hobbes, Dilbert, Marmaduke (reminds me of MY mutt), Garfield and Peanuts.

I never watched TOS, only TNG, Voyager, and a little of DS9. Never even wanted to watch Enterprise

Trekkies don't have a life outside of the Star Trek universe, while us Trekkers can get along nicely (as long as you don't call us Trekkies, even the Great Bird of the Galaxy made that mistake once). To demonstrate that I am not a Trekkie and can get along sans-Trek, see the bottom of the post.

Trekkers put on a STARFLEET ensemble to a convention because it’s a fun thing to do…though I've never even been to one.
Trekkies wear uniforms to a convention because they are trying to copy the style of the academy.

Trekkers place a STARFLEET Academy window sticker on their car…
Trekkies study for the actual entrance exams.

Trekkers believe Wil Wheaton was lucky enough to take on a role in Star Trek…
Trekkies feel that Wesley Crusher was a fortunate guy who got a chance to sit on the bridge.

Trekkers feel its unfortunate that the show has reached its end…
Trekkies believe its unfortunate that the crew faces reassignment and the Enterprise will become decommissioned.

Trekkers know that there are inconsistencies with the technological aspect of the show, but still chooses to ignore this factor…
Trekkies cannot wait until they can get their hands on a home food replicator unit.”
http://members.tripod.com/~learnb/dauntless/recdeck.htm

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...a chicken crossed the road:
Here's why

VADER: Because it could not resist the power of the Dark Side.
YODA: Crossing the road makes not a chicken great.
LUKE: Crossing the road is one thing, this is.... totally different.
LUKE: I want to follow the ways of the chicken and cross the road like my father.
LEIA: I don't know... but I have a bad feeling about this.
HAN: Hurry up, colonel sanders, or you're gonna be a permanent resident!
THREEPIO: I am fluent in over six million ways of crossing the road.
R2D2: beep beep be bop.
CHEWIE: Gwrrroooooaaaarrrrrrlllllll!
BEN: Cross the road, chicken. Let go, chicken. Chicken - trust me.
BOBA FETT: What if the chicken doesn't survive? He's worth a lot to me!
WEDGE: My scope shows the other side but it looks really far, are you sure you can cross it?
JERJERROD: The chicken is crossing the road? We shall double our efforts.
BIB: Die chicken wanga?
BIGGS: At that speed, will you be able to cross in time?
TARKIN: The regional governors now have direct control over their chickens. Fear will keep those chickens in line... fear of getting hit by a car!
UNCLE OWEN: I told you to forget it. You're only concern is to cross that road.
AUNT BERU: He can't stay here forever. Most of his friends have already crossed. It means so much to him.
ADMIRAL ACKBAR: All chickens - prepare to cross the road on my mark
LANDO: Why you slimy, no good, double-crossing chicken!! You got a lot of guts crossing that road, after what you pulled!
EMPEROR: Young fool. Only now, after getting hit by a car do you understand.
JABBA: Bo shuda chicken!

Dirty Harry Chicken: "Go ahead and cross the road, make my day!"

Forum: Air Force Life

The Chicken is Crossing the Road Again