Pacific Thunder, Pacific Lightning feedback/snippets

I figured to save another thread from going off-topic, I'd start a new thread for feedback. Let me know how I can improve the storyline, characters, events, etc.

This is the first snippet of the synopsis that I have ready, I'm just looking for feedback on this right now. I'm doing this to make sure I can make this book the best it can be. I have some of the knowledge of how a war is fought, but I'd like to know the feelings of what it's like to go into combat with a plane strapped to your back.

Read and enjoy.


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ptpl: I read the clip from ur book - looked pretty sick man - much props . You got a release date in mind ?

Nope, not a clue--going to have to do another restructuring of the story--the first manuscript will only be about the Marine characters--the next books will be about (in the order I'll write them) the Air Force, Army, and Navy.

I just decided on the restructuring in the last two days, it was my plan originally, but I shelved it to try and shove everything into one book. I want to get closer to the characters, so that means I have to devote one book to only two characters--and what's better, I've decided to go self-publishing for the first one. For the second and subsequent manuscripts, if a publishing house offers me a deal, i'll do it--as long as I can approve any changes to the stories.

Sounds a lot like Shaara's style (who is one of my favorite author's btw) - You should read 'To the last man' and 'The Killer Angels' by Jeff Shaara -might give you some more ideas. They are about WWI and the Civil war respectively, and they each tell the story through 5 or 6 main characters. Both are awesome, and 'TKA" was literally the only school-required book i ever enjoyed.

Sounds a lot like Shaara's style (who is one of my favorite author's btw) - You should read 'To the last man' and 'The Killer Angels' by Jeff Shaara -might give you some more ideas. They are about WWI and the Civil war respectively, and they each tell the story through 5 or 6 main characters. Both are awesome, and 'TKA" was literally the only school-required book i ever enjoyed.

Though I appreciate the tip, I'm not sure how much I could gain from it, the story follows the Generals, and what I'd be looking for is--as it's been put to me--"the dumb grunt". On top of that, I'm still starting out, and reading too many books, I fear I might start writing like other authors in the genre. As I said, I'm trimming back to just focus on one branch at a time, so I can spend more time on their emotions during the fight.

btw, TKA wasn't written by Jeff, it was written by his father Michael Shaara, though Jeff did write a prequel and sequel.


I saw that that piece has been downloaded 14 times, after logging out, I discovered that people not registered here can download things, so I won't be putting any more stuff on here--if anyone would like the latest synopsis when I finish it, my email is PTPLauthor@yahoo.com--I will reply with the latest copy of the synopsis. If it is possible for the mods, I ask that they edit out the download attachment, I can no longer access it to delete it myself, thanks.


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Per request, attachment was nuked.

right about TKA - my bad

no prob, I might make the same mistake--Sierra happens--you're human--or a Decepticon, I haven't determined which yet....

And many more thanks, TC

Hate to revive a long dead thread - but anything new to report on the novel(s) front ptplauthor? And best of luck on your literary aspirations by the way!

i haven't been doing any writing in so long, lol. I actually have put PTPL aside for now, I'm still considering writing it, but my health has to come first. I have so many mental issues I need to sort out right now, its not even funny.

I've been battling some severe depression and other medical issues over the past year and a half.