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ATC
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 Posted: Sep 30, 2008 - 01:56 PM
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Active Member
Joined: Nov 17, 2005 - 01:06 AM
Posts: 245
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One of my favorites:
Here's one they just made up: "near miss". When two planes almost collide, they call it a near miss. It's a near hit. A collision is a near miss. |
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Lord bless Charlie Mops
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Sponsor
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 Posted: May 27, 2012 - 1:01 AM
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F-16.net Sponsor
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TC
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Posted: Oct 01, 2008 - 02:24 AM
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F-16.net Moderator
Joined: Jan 14, 2004 - 07:06 AM
Posts: 3999
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"Place your seatback forward."
"Well I DON'T bend that way! If I could place my seatback forward, I'd be in PORNO MOVIES!"
"In the unlikely event of a water landing..."
"Well what exactly is a water landing? Am I mistaken, or does this sound somewhat similar to, CRASHING INTO THE OCEAN?"
"Your seat cushion can be used as a floatation device."
"Well imagine that! My seat cushion...just what I need! To float around the North Atlantic for several days, clinging to a pillow full of BEER FARTS!"
"...and who made this man a Captain anyway? Did I sleep through some Armed Forces swearing in ceremony?...Tell the 'Captain' that Air Marshal Carlin says to go F*** yourself!" 
This was George at his best! |
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"He counted on America to be passive...He counted wrong." -- President Ronald Reagan
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LinkF16SimDude
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Posted: Oct 01, 2008 - 04:22 AM
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Elite 2K
Joined: Jan 31, 2004 - 07:18 PM
Posts: 2232
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From a Richard Jeni (RIP) bit:
"If my seat cushion can be turned into a flotation device, how come the plane doesn't just turn into a boat?!!!"
"In the unlikely event of an emergency....
Well if it's sooooo unlikely then why even bring it up? Ya tryin' to scare us?"
"This is the Captain: In the un-LIKE-ly event you see me prancin' bare-a$$ naked down the main cabin wearin' nothin' but a World War I Kaiser helmet and singin' 'Clang Clang Clang Went The Trolley'....the drinks are on me!"
OK....so it ain't Carlin...but it's still funny... |
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Why does "monosyllabic" have 5 syllables?
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TC
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Posted: Oct 01, 2008 - 06:17 AM
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F-16.net Moderator
Joined: Jan 14, 2004 - 07:06 AM
Posts: 3999
Status: Offline
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parrothead wrote:
Aussie_Falcon_Freak wrote:
As for a shot of my cousin....Well, I don't wanna spoil you guys now, do I?
TC wrote:
Yes! Yes you do! 
Still waiting 
Over a year later Aussie...still waiting...tick tock, tick tock.
You know, you could, if nothing else, keep it professional, and send a pic of your cousin in her Qantas uniform...her "Dress Blues", if you will. We don't necessarily need a bikini shot of your cousin, however, if one were to post a pic of that nature, I know it would not be unappreciated. |
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"He counted on America to be passive...He counted wrong." -- President Ronald Reagan
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Aussie_Falcon_Freak
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Posted: Mar 04, 2009 - 10:27 PM
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Active Member
Joined: Jan 28, 2007 - 08:32 AM
Posts: 122
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TC wrote:
parrothead wrote:
Aussie_Falcon_Freak wrote:
As for a shot of my cousin....Well, I don't wanna spoil you guys now, do I?
TC wrote:
Yes! Yes you do!
Still waiting
Over a year later Aussie...still waiting...tick tock, tick tock.
You know, you could, if nothing else, keep it professional, and send a pic of your cousin in her Qantas uniform...her "Dress Blues", if you will. We don't necessarily need a bikini shot of your cousin, however, if one were to post a pic of that nature, I know it would not be unappreciated.
OK... Well, I'm finally back after a rotten year and I'm finally starting to feel better again... I searched high and low through my photos and I didn't have a lot of good ones of her, but here is a shot of my cousin from her facebook page... Comments??? |
| Description: |
| From her facebook page... |
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36.24 KB |
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1189 Time(s) |
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I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure...
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TC
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Posted: Mar 04, 2009 - 11:19 PM
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F-16.net Moderator
Joined: Jan 14, 2004 - 07:06 AM
Posts: 3999
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Note to self...Buy several tickets for Qantas. Be on lookout for good looking brunette flight attendant...
You definitely grow 'em nice down in Oz! |
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"He counted on America to be passive...He counted wrong." -- President Ronald Reagan
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StolichnayaStrafer
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Posted: Mar 05, 2009 - 02:06 AM
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Forum Veteran
Joined: Jan 20, 2008 - 04:50 PM
Posts: 844
Location: Dodge City, Moscowchusetts
Status: Offline
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| Your cousin is very beautiful, whomever gets her as a Bride will be a lucky man indeed. |
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Why is the vodka gone?
Why is the vodka always gone... oh- that's why!
Hide the vodka!!!
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Aussie_Falcon_Freak
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Posted: Mar 05, 2009 - 06:15 AM
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Active Member
Joined: Jan 28, 2007 - 08:32 AM
Posts: 122
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| Thank you for your comments gentlemen... She has transferred to international mid way through last year.. Not sure of all her destinations, but I know Hong Kong is one of them... I should hit her up for some "family discount" tickets for our next holiday... |
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I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure...
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asiatrails
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Posted: Mar 09, 2009 - 12:13 AM
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Forum Veteran
Joined: Aug 30, 2005 - 03:11 AM
Posts: 865
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Aussie_Falcon_Freak wrote:
Hell yeah TC!! That really makes them a "full service" airline for sure... Although after seeing her, I'm sure he could have picked a better looking one... I would have at least..
In an interesting sideline, my cousin is a flight attendant for Qantas...  Yikes.. I'd better keep an eye on the girl now, hadn't I??
Alcohol is a great leveler. She is a former cop who resigned due to stress, I guess Ralph got his in the can. Was this a can-can dance? |
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