Military Aviation Humor

Actual radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95

no. 1: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.
no. 2: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.
no. 1: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship, I say again, divert YOUR course.
no. 2: No, I say again, you divert YOUR course.
no. 1: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS ENTERPRISE, WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE US NAVY, DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW!
no. 2: This is a lighthouse, Your Call.
no. 1: ...