This story was told to me by a friend who "swore" he heard it on an IFR flight in Germany. It seems a "good ol' boy" American (Texas-sounding) AF C-130 reserve pilot was in the (that day very crowded) instrument pattern for landing at Rhein-Main. The conversation went something like this:
"AF1733, You are on an eight mile final for 27R. You have a UH-1 three miles ahead of you on final; reduce speed to 130 knots."
"Rogo', Frankfurt. We're bringing this big bird back to one-hundred and thirty knots fur ya."
Cont (a few moments later):
"AF33, helicopter traffic at 90 knots now 1 1/2miles ahead of you; reduce speed further to 110 knots."
"AF thirty-three reining this here bird back further to 110 knots"
"AF33, you are three miles to touchdown, helicopter traffic now 1 mile ahead of you; reduce speed to 90 knots"
Pilot (a little miffed):
"Sir, do you know what the stall speed of this here C-130 is?"
"No, but if you ask your co-pilot, he can probably tell you."